Wednesday, November 7, 2012

This moment....

It is 6:20 PM and dark outside.  The kids are playing with cars with daddy - zooming them across the fireplace hearth and seeing how far they fly through the air before they land.  Actually, when I say kids, I really mean Cooper, as Melody is much less interested and intent on this make-believe world of race cars.  She is kind of hovering in on the boys' action, playing her own make - believe games...namely the game of "what can I stick in my mouth and suck on without getting it noticed or taken away?" This evening, it is the nipple from one of her baby bottles.  And it is a make-believe game, because of course, her father and I both notice it.  We also notice the trail of snot running out of her nose and onto her upper lips.  She needs a tissue bad, but daddy is busy playing cars, and me - I'm up to elbows in soap and water as I clean the evening's dishes.

Daddy finally breaks free and grabs a tissue for Melody.  She squeals as she tries to escape the nose-wiping, but alas, she is not strong enough (but considering the difference in size, she puts up a pretty good fight!).  Nose wiped, it is back to playing.  And I am still doing dishes. 

Anyone can tell you - I don't like washing dishes.  I can cook all day long - happy to stay in the kitchen, experimenting, whipping up, baking, sauteeing, deglazing, TASTING!!!, I love to pore over recipes, spend hours in the grocery store, and slow-roast pretty much anything, but the cleaning up afterwards?!  Ugh.  Tonight I don't mind it so much - I was able to unload the dishwasher before dinner, so I'm starting with a clean slate.  It only takes a few minutes to load it up and wash the roasting pan and saute pan I used while making dinner.  For some inexplicable reason, the old girl scout song "Make new friends" is stuck in my head.  It is this that I hum as I wash, wash, wash..."Make new friends, but keep the old...One is silver and the other gold". 

From my place behind the sink, I can see into almost every room, nook and cranny of our one-outlet apartment.  (I love that phrase - it means that you can vacuum the entire house using only one outlet)  But, I don't see cramped, tiny, tight, tense.  I don't see thin walls, or OLD appliances.  I don't see a window that looks out onto a cement staircase instead of a yard (or even a pecan orchard).  In this moment, all I can see, all I can hear, all I can think (besides making new friends and keeping the old), all I can feel is love.  My belly is full, my heart is full, and my arms are literally full with the blessings of the Lord.  God has richly blessed me - beyond my own comprehension.  He has given me a husband I don't deserve, children that I don't deserve, a family and so many friends that I don't deserve.  He has a plan for me and for us, and in this moment, His  love is so evident.  It is all around - it overwhelms and overflows. 

I am writing this so that I remember this.  I want to hold on to this moment and make it last.  Of course, that is impossible, moments are fleeting - nothing really lasts.  But the one thing - love.  That lasts.  This moment lives on if I can take the love with me.  So, tomorrow, I may not remember the feel of my soapy hands or the dirty dishes, I may not remember the sound of race cars whizzing through the air,  I probably won't even remember Melody's huge snot trail (I hope that I don't remember that!)  But Lord, please, oh please, let me remember the love.  Let me remember this moment. 

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